Mat Quiz

Los Angeles Times – May 21, 1952
By Braven Dyer

Question – Why is wrestling?

Answer – Well, why not?

Q – Who is this guy Lou Thesz?

A – He’s the NWA (National Wrestling Alliance) champion, and don’t call him a “guy.”

Q – Who’s Baron Leone?

A – Where you been hiding? The Baron’s Pacific Coast world champ.

Q – How many worlds are there?

A – Just one. It says so in a book by the late Wendell Wilkie.

Q – Is wrestling mentioned in the Bible?

A – Many times. The Lord wrestled with the devil.

Q – No kidding. Is wrestling the oldest sport?

A – You mean indoor or outdoor? Yes, it is, over 3,000 years old.

Q – Is wrestling a part of the Olympic Games?

A – Natch. It was one of the most important, back in 708 B.C., in the old Olympic Games – the originals.

Q – Why is the game so rough? Aren’t there wrestling rules?

A – Kicking and striking was permitted by the ancient Greeks in their wrestling bouts. I guess the Greeks had a word for it. We have one today: It is “Booo.”

Q – Who’s the greatest wrestler of all time?

A – S’matter, you tryin’ to get me knocked off? Oldtimers insist it was Frank Gotch; others say the Great Gama, Hindu ace, was even better. Me? I’ll say the winner of the Thesz-Leone match (I’m a diplomat.)

Q – What’s the longest wrestling match on record?

A – Fellow named Eugene Tremblay wrestled a guy named Billeter, from Toledo, about 7 – hours; it went to a draw. They were lightweights. That was many years ago.

Q – How about nowadays?

A – Matches nowadays are limited; for instance, Thesz and Leone is a two-hour contest. If no fall is scored, the referee will render a decision.

Q – Is Michele Leone a real Baron?

A – Is Duke Ellington a real Duke? Is Count Basie a real Count? Is Prince Mike Romanoff a real Prince? Was King Baggott a real King? I dunno. In our circles we do not question a man’s ancestry; if Leone calls himself a Baron, that’s o.k. Lord Blears is legally a “Lord.” Had his name changed by law.

Q – Will this be the biggest gate in wrestling tonight?

A – Oh, come now; it will be the biggest locally beyond a doubt; the Everett Marshall-Gus Sonnenberg match hit up in the 60 Gs, and so did Jeemy Londos and Man Mountain Dean. Tonight’s will beat those marks to flinders.

Q – Why is wrestling so popular?

A – Well, I heard one definition somewhere: Wrestling is co-operative, whereas boxing is competitive. I’m just kidding!

Q – How long is a wrestler’s life?

A – I presume you mean, how long can he wrestle? Well, Stanislaus Zbyszko wrestled at the age of 68; some of the boys now who are top stars are past 40. Barring accidents or injuries, a grappler can operate for anywhere between 20 and 30 years.

Q – How old is Baron Leone?

A – He says he’s 36. Oh, yes; Jack Benny is 39.

Q – And how old is Lou Thesz?

A – He admits to 33.

Q – How many bouts do big-time wrestlers work in their careers?

A – Strangler Ed Lewis – he is Thesz’ manager – wrestled 6,200; that’s over a period of 40 years. Thesz himself has wrestled 2,500. The Baron does not know; he thinks about 3,000. (Gosh, I think it’s more than that; I’ve seen him in 3,000 matches within the past year on my TV set!)

Q – Are wrestlers human?

A – Why don’t you ask one of them yourself.

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2 responses to “Mat Quiz

  1. Favorite Thesz quote: We can do this easy or we can do this hard. Upon entering the ring with Buddy Rogers

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